A series of ridiculous events - part III.1

HOLY MOTHER OF PEARL.
Seriously
Seriously seriously, where do I begin? Where do I end? Does it end??
Saturday

GAME DAY.
Caroline, Safia, and I got an early morning start. We thought we had THE WHOLE DAY planned out - or at least, I did. Go to the game, tailgait, win the game, leave, get back, shower, get ready, leave for the UCLA orchestra concert, enjoy, enjoy, enjoy, blah blah blah, fun fun fun.
Leaving at 10:30 with food and my gourmet, $7 bag of vegetable chips, we were off. We arrive at the Rose Bowl (my first time there) and park on a golf course. Enclosed in between cars at every imaginable angle thinking how the holy do we get out of here at the end? Whatever, game's first. Get the food, switch my bag - SWITCHED MY BAG, REMEMBER THE BAG. We walk about 5 minutes away from the car and...
(FORGETFUL EVENT #3) I left my ticket in my car. So we go back, come back, walk a million miles, get 2ND ROW SEATS at the game next to the band and enjoy the game. We were on two TV networks, but don't know which ones. We may have quite possibly looking like maniacs, but we are now celebrities, nonetheless. Upon leaving, I kind of fell. I don't know how, I just lost footing, it was a lot of stairs. But I looked like a wobbly, drunk girl, "that girl," who fell at the top of the stairs. My foot screws couldn't save me from the humiliation. "Is she ok?" I hear.
"SHE'S FINE!" - Caroline.

We take an alternative route back to the car.

BAD IDEA.

We must have walked at least a mile, maybe more, past really stupid, drunk, "horny" as Safia called them, university of classless americans that kept staring at us. The Walk of Hell.

We get in the car at 5:20. Umm... we have a concert at 8 to get to and we need to get back asap.
Our needs were not met, not by any means.
We LITERALLY moved 10 feet in about 45 minutes. When Omid texted us, "Any progress?", I told Safia not to respond because well, we had nothing to say.
Why was there no one delegating traffic??
Why was there no civility?? Are we all barbarians with no common sense??? I think so. Stupid Rose Bowl.
The thing is, no matter how hard I try to explain our situation to anyone, NO ONE will ever truly understand except for the three of us. One hour and we hadn't moved. We had places to go, people to see, food to eat, lives to live!! I almost cried, but didn't.

Then Maximus and I did it - with the approval of C & S. We cut across about 200 feet and MERGED into this lane and MERGED into another one. I let this other man MERGE in front of me and another one also MERGED without my approval. I MERGED again with the five lanes that were trying to MERGE into one. I didn't let the THIRD guy MERGE in front of me - WE HAVE AN ORCHESTRA CONCERT TO GO TO!!

I wish I could make this short, but I honestly cannot.

We drive up the hill, down the hill, around the hill and land at the 210.

WEST or EAST?
WEST OR EAST??

We go West.
Bad Idea.
We go back East.
Bad Idea.
We exit on Arroyo because that's where we came from. Safe bet, you know? 10 minutes down the street and about 1.5 hours after getting into our car initially, we arrive...

at the rose bowl.

Shoot me.

Caroline calls her sister for directions, I almost hang up on Omid after calling. Tension is rising! Cars are piling!! Our stomachs our growling!!!

We find Orange Grove (which hits the 110) PERFECT.

Right or Left?
RIGHT OR LEFT??

I go right after almost jerking left.
Cop behind me.
"PULL OVER! KIRAN, PULL OVER!!" - Caroline

GOD, NO. PLEASE NO!!!! I just got new insurance, it's much more expensive.. NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

The cop drives by after rudely looking at me and giving a brief sound of his siren.

We arrive at the 110 screaming, shouting, yelling, clapping with glee. Safia even takes a picture of the freeway sign. We couldn't ask for more or be happier. Right?

Turn onto the freeway and BAM

STOPPED TRAFFIC.

HAHAHAHAHAHA. Life doesn't get more ironic, unpredictable, or ridiculous.

I bust out my reliable Sinatra CD, play track 15 - "That's Life" incredibly loudly, roll down the windows and sing my heart out as we drive 10 mph. Caroline's waving a USC pom pom out the window and Safia's taking pictures while texting Omid of our "progress," if you can call it that.
It's about 7:30/7:40 and the concert's at 8, remember?

We persist.

We take an alternative route suggested by a friend. 5s, 10w, 110s, home.
Well, the 10w isn't an option from the 5s. We realized this AFTER we get on the 10 East. Make a U-turn, go around, and finally arrive home at about 8:05/8:10. We got in our cars at 5:20.

Does the night end?
HAHA
Who am I kidding? It's just begun.